Junior/Senior War 2009

Aftermath at home of Academy Junior Laura Cardell after the last night of Homecoming.
Seniors and Juniors from David Emanuel Academy recently participated in an ancient high school tradition that can be traced back to the Ancient Romans: Junior/Senior Wars. Each class travelled from city to city for one week and vandalized their opponents' houses with all manners of paper products. As predicted, the Seniors were the undisputed winners at the end of the week, emerging with a total of 12 houses completely rolled. The Juniors partially rolled eight houses, including one elderly Metter citizen completely uninvolved in the festivities. A controversial paintball ambush of the Junior class, resulting in the Seniors taking all that was left of their paper, sealed the victory for the Class of 2010.
This bale of shredded paper was spotted amongst the Seniors' supply stockpile in an undisclosed location.

New Athletics Bus Purchased

DEA Head Baseball Coach Travis Motes realized during last year's season that the team needed a larger means of transportation. He found the solution in the Middle Tennessee Baptist Church, which was looking to sell their fire-engine-red bus, complete with flame decals and inspirational Bible verses. Coach Motes seized the opportunity as only a true businessman could. For an undisclosed sum, the DEA Booster Club purchased the bus (seen right) with funds raised from last year's Silly Sock Day and Hat Day, where students were allowed the privilege to wear silly socks in exchange for a small donation.
The baseball team is extremely enthusiastic about their new ride. In an interview last week, DEA Senior Chris Sheppherd replied:
"Yeah dude! I can't wait to slap some Ron Jon stickers on that [bus]!"                                                                                                                             Above: The new bus carries the Headmaster's Honor Roll
                                                                                                                                                                         students to their quarterly luncheon at McDonald's.

Pigeon Shoot Announced

The date and times for DEA's 17th annual Stillmore Pigeon Shoot have been released: the event is scheduled for April 18, the weekend preceding prom, and will begin at 6:00 A.M. It will be sponsored by the generous donations of Crider Poultry, Inc., who will also buy any collected fowl from contestants at market price. Prizes of DEA Cookbooks will be awarded to the winners of three categories: Largest Bird, Most Birds, and Least Disease-Infested Bird. Refreshments will be available courtesy of the Eagle Cafe.

Due to the success of last year's event, the contest is now open to men and women ages 5 and up who reside in Candler or Emanuel Counties. Registration forms are available in the school office and must be turned in by March 31st.


Above: Last year's Pigeon Shoot winner John Dekle (right) poses for a picture with his trophies.

Graffiti Vandals!

February 9, 2009

School officials were shocked upon arrival to the Academy this morning when it was discovered that vandals had left their mark on the campus. A large work of graffiti, pictured above, had been plastered on the side of the lunchroom building either during the night or in the wee hours of this morning. Amidst the drawing were scattered cryptic phrases such as "ECI", "Metter", and "M-Town." Upon further investigation by the Stillmore Police Force, the symbol "B12" was found next to an arrow pointing at the roof. Some suspect that this symbol has been linked to previous activities by the Stillmore Mafia, who sometimes go by the slang term of "B12." Whether or not the arrow is indicating something hidden on the roof still remains to be seen.

While the police have not issued a name as of yet, there are several suspects in the crime. As mentioned earlier, organized crime from Stillmore may have had a hand in it, but other suspects include recent ECI transfer student Chris Sheppherd (who goes by the alias of "Shep") due to his ties with students of that school, as well as Mrs. Amy Hendrix, a teacher at DEA who was first to arrive on campus early this morning. No one wants to point fingers, but no one saw any evidence of vandalism before Hendrix arrived.

Other concerns include removing the paint, which several students have opposed, saying that the artwork is an appreciated addition to the otherwise bland campus. While the administration sees it strictly as defacing of school property, many of the kids have enjoyed viewing the piece and trying to uncover its hidden secrets. More information to be released further into the week.


Close Call for the Academy

Local officials in Stillmore reported a "close call" today after a leaking gas pipeline was discovered in a school classroom. Students first reported strange, gas-like smells eminating from behind the Spanish teacher's desk. At first the odor was thought to have resulted from DEA senior Jordan Wiley, but the truth was soon discovered: a gas line connected to the heater had become dislodged, and was pumping toxic fumes into the air. The school was immediately evacuated and the Stillmore HAZMAT Team was quick to arrive.

After the students left, Ricky Sanchez, Chief of the Stillmore Fire Department, stated, "This incident could have been catastrophic. If any student or teacher had activated a cigarette lighter or any other device containing an open flame, the results would have been similar to a nuclear explosion." The effects of the gas in students' lungs is still being evaluated, but no brain damage is thought to have occurred. All the same, DEA's staff decided to take Friday off, just to be on the safe side.